Part of learning to be a good massage therapist is learning about setting professional boundaries. When the therapist is clothed and upright and the client is naked and prone, obviously there’s a power differential, and good trust-building boundaries are essential.
My training packet included a one-page checklist for relationship boundaries. I liked it and hadn’t seen it before. You might like reading it too. One column is the unhealthy, co-dependent, lack-of-appropriate-boundary way of doing things. The second column describes what a person whose healthy boundaries are intact would behave.
I see areas where I can improve. I really took this one to heart:
When your boundaries are intact in a relationship, you are only satisfied if you are thriving.
I love that. Instead of being satisfied by merely coping and surviving, I can upgrade my standards for myself in relationship. I now include the core question, “What might it take for me to thrive?” into my relationships and new partnerships, ventures, collaborations, agreements, negotiations, and so on.
And of course, others I relate to may have the same standard! In fact, I hope they do!
Here’s a link to the whole list. It just might make a good daily checklist.
The source is The Center for Human Potential. Check out their other great resources too.