I’m doing it, I’m teaching yoga!

This week I taught three yoga classes. I substituted for my teacher at my regular Tuesday yoga class. No newbies showed up, so I was teaching mid-beginners, advanced beginners, and maybe even intermediate level yogis.

I brought something to use as a script but ended up winging it.

My pacing was a little off. I started the wind-down a little too early and led them through a lot of twists and an extra-long savasana in order to fill out the hour.

I don’t think they minded.

I’m learning to go with the flow. I notice what people are doing when it’s time to start. Are they lying down, sitting, or standing? I’ll start with what most of them are doing.

I also ask if there’s anything people would like to work on.

The Wednesday night class was the second of my four-class series, Yoga for Novices. It is harder to teach true beginners, especially if they haven’t had dance, Pilates, martial arts, and other similar experiences with their bodies. There are some fundamentals that underly yoga. You teach body awareness, and you break asana down into small chunks.

My teacher helped me teach that class. Her 11-year-old son attended too, and he made it more fun. He is a creative kid. Can’t wait to see what he’ll be like in 6 or 7 years!

The class today was small, and again, I went with the flow. These people have been doing yoga for months or years and are fit. One woman wanted to focus on opening up her shoulders. The others wanted a variety of asanas and some inversions. Everyone got what they wanted.

I had no problem thinking up poses or pacing. I observed the students, and it just came to me what to do next.

I feel happy about this. I’m halfway through my yoga teacher training, and I can teach yoga without a script.

I’ve moved into conscious competence.

Is pain necessary for growth?

The reason I bring this question up is that today, my left leg hurts, and I have a story about it.

The story starts small. My left leg hurts. Specifically it hurts above my knee and on my inner shin and on my outer calf. It’s a dull achiness that comes and goes.

The story gets bigger. I attribute this pain to adhesions in the fascia between muscles in my leg, and I attribute these adhesions to misalignments in my body’s structure. I’ve already straightened my spine with NUCCA. Working with my AK chiropractor to align my body is going well, but my leg is where the twist is showing up now that my pelvis is getting more aligned. My leg needs to unwind. And it’s Saturday.

(By the way, it feels true to me that the musculo-skeletal system is arranged in spirals. I dreamt a couple of months ago of seeing my left leg skinless, bloodless, with all the muscles showing individually and the bones visible. Then I went to the Our Body exhibit and saw a body with a leg just like in my dream.)

Here the story grows. My pelvis and spine have been twisted due to several factors. A car wreck in 1996 created much soft tissue injury around my sacrum and sacroiliac joints. Long before that, I experienced a severe shock to my system in my childhood, a sudden violent death of a family member. Trauma has deep and sometimes unpredictable affects on the human energy field.

And now the story gets even bigger. I was born prematurely, and it seems that I had an injury to a nerve going from my sacrum down my left leg from the time I was born, or before I was born, or shortly after I was born. I don’t remember, and my parents are gone. I do not know what happened or why I entered my lifetime with this nerve shut down.

I’m aware that some people claim to know all about past lives and karma and would probably be more than happy to tell me in a way that would alienate me from them. (You know what I mean: “I was just being honest, trying to be helpful.” I’ve done that kind of thing myself, and it’s usually deeply out of rapport with the recipient. You may be right, but you’re an asshole.)

The good news is, the nerve can come back alive. It’s not dead, it’s just been dormant. How much of our potential is like that?

Pain is a teacher, a signal that something is out of congruence, out of alignment, misfunctioning. And it is instinctive to want to avoid it. That’s why it’s such a good teacher. Pain is a kind of feedback that’s hard to ignore.

Pain is not bad. It’s just pain. It’s the nervous system doing its job. Pain feels yucky, but it has some positive points to it.

Pain motivates change. Pain motivates me to do something different, to learn something new. My specific SI joint-spine-leg pain has motivated me to do yoga, to get rolfed, to go to chiropractors, to work with Alexander Technique and Feldenkrais practitioners, to experience an array of alternative healing methods.

It’s motivated me to hang upside down and surrender to gravity pulling my body from the other direction. It’s motivated me to learn the trauma releasing exercises, and it’s drawn me to work with Patrice, my acupuncturist, who first told me to hang like a bat and to hold pigeon pose twice as long on the left side and who does myofascial release on me. (And who I can’t get hold of now either.)

I think I’ll go hang, do pigeon, and do the trauma releasing exercises.  Pain provides contrast. How would you know how good you felt if you didn’t have anything to compare it to?

Future home of the International Dream Center

It’s Monday night. Went back to work today after 4 days off for a trip to west Texas. Got home late last night, up early this morning. Right now I’m sensing some space to reflect and write, so here I am.

This travel was full of good memories, of exploring the new-to-me southern route from San Antonio to Fort Davis on US 90 with my friend and travel companion Linaka.

Out in the middle of nowhere we saw an interesting sign: Future Home of the International Dream Center. That in many ways was the theme for the trip, since it seems we all dream ourselves into being, dream the lives we live. We did some great dreaming out there in the Davis Mountains.

Big skies and long views were companions on this trip, so refreshing after the closeness of the city. The drier air and cooler temperatures were welcome too.

Thursday night we spread a tarp on the ground in the driveway of the Chihuahuan Desert Research Institute and faced an impossibly starry sky, with the glowing Milky Way bisecting the ethereal dome. Our friends Keith and Merrie found us there and joined us in screams and laughter every time a meteor blazed across the sky. Friend Vee joined us in our accommodations later, having driven out from Dallas.

Balancing activity with leisure is the art of vacations. We created a picnic and attended a Star Party at McDonald Observatory. That outdoor amphitheater for star-gazing near a mountaintop has got to be one of the great spots in Texas. We also sat around the pool at our “tourist camp” and conversed for hours.

Saturday night, I finally saw the mysterious Marfa lights, on my third attempt. Again, the sky treated us to a great show–not just the mystery lights appearing, disappearing, moving, but also a setting crescent moon turning orange, Mars, Venus, far-off lightning, and again, that Milky Way.

I must not forget to mention I got in a swim in Balmorhea State Park.

On the drive back, Keith and I stopped at Sonora Caverns for a trip 155 feet deep into Pacha Mama, past pristine cave formations.

And yes, I did some sitting! Even dropped in on a yoga class that was a bit more intense than my usual classes. I felt challenged and liked it. Even held bakasana (crane pose), an arm balance, for longer than I ever have before. I shower Linaka with gratitude for being a beginner yogi and taking the class with me.

I feel so blessed to have these friends, this time, this setting, these memories.

Dark skies, meteor showers, nightwalking

I am going to West Texas in a couple of days with some friends. We will drive out Thursday, perhaps taking US 90 (the southern route), which is an unknown part of Texas to me. I’m looking forward to that.

We’ll be staying at the Stone Village Tourist Camp in Fort Davis, where I have reserved a “camping cabin” — good for the budget traveler, it has no AC and shared bathroom facilities. Balmorhea State Park was full, and I don’t even try Davis Mountains State Park any more because most of my compadres are not into camping, we don’t plan far enough ahead, and…the stench and noise of javelinas right outside my tent at night is unappealing.

Thursday is the peak of the Perseid meteor shower. Look toward the northeast after full darkness. We may check in, take a little nap, eat, hang out, and then about 10 pm drive a little south of Fort Davis to have a stupendous view from the heights out over the flat plains to the north.

Friday perhaps we’ll swim at Balmorhea, do some hiking, and in the evening attend the twilight program (new for me) and then the Star Party at McDonald Observatory, after which we will do some nightwalking on a dark, deserted country road under the darkest skies in Texas.

For more about nightwalking, read here: http://www.navaching.com/hawkeen/nwalk.html. For our Austin peripheral walking meetup, go here: http://www.meetup.com/Austin-Peripheral-Walking-Meetup/.

Saturday, we may drive to Marfa for the farmer’s market, visit to the Chihuahuan Desert Botanical Center in Alpine, return to Marfa for dinner, and then go out to the viewing area for the Marfa lights. I’ve been a couple of times but have not seen these mysterious long-known lights yet.

Sunday, drive back with perhaps a stop at Sonora Caverns — so isolated, so clean, so cool and damp and fascinating.

All in all, it’s a much needed break from work, a time to spend with friends in the clean air, big skies, spaciousness, and pleasing views of the Davis Mountains. Will bring my yoga mat and zafu and keep up with my yoga and sitting practice and my 5 minutes of pranayama practice, breathing in that good clean air.

Mostly it will be a wonderful change in energy. This trip feels like I’m being called. What awaits me? I’ll tell you when I get back.

I skipped meditating this morning…

…and I am really feeling it. Skipped my three sun salutations too, although I did bridge in bed.

I feel really tight across the back of my shoulders. My patience and equanimity feel thinner too. I am not liking this at all!

I have been really consistent at getting up early, doing a little yoga, and sitting for 30 minutes for several months now. Especially before work. On weekends I cut myself a little slack and do it later, or sit with my sangha for much longer.

Hmm. Perhaps that was the true purpose of skipping out this morning, so I could really notice the difference that yoga and meditation done early in the day affect the rest of my day.

I’m going to close my office door, roll out my mat, and do those sun salutations right now. And even though I don’t have time to meditate, 5 minutes of breathing with awareness will make a big difference.

Article: Yoga’s Newest Fans, in the New York Times

Thanks to my fellow yogi Clare Townes for sending me this link. It just made my day. Click the link and read about chair yoga at senior centers, even savasana for the bedridden.

Yoga, which is mostly about breath and awareness as the article states, is for everyone.

http://newoldage.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/08/05/yogas-newest-fans/?src=me&ref=health

Recommendation from new yoga student

Very grateful to have this recommendation from a new student last night:

Mary Ann is a generous, patient, and experienced yoga instructor. She is flexible in her approach and can accommodate the needs of complete newbies and advanced students, adjusting poses for different experience levels, body types, degrees of flexibility, and health issues. She modifies poses using props, and she substitutes alternate poses that stretch the same muscle groups in a different way for more or less advanced individual students. For example, she suggested using folded blankets to achieve the desired straightness of back for a number of the floor poses, and she helped me experiment with the “supine pigeon” pose to find an approach that would stretch the right muscle groups in my hips without stressing my neck.

Mary Ann encourages her students to challenge themselves, always reminding them to listen to their bodies and learn when they can safely push their limits, and when they should pull back. Her feedback is helping me to be able to feel when I am performing a pose correctly and to understand what movements instructors are trying to elicit when they say things like “draw down your shoulder blades” or “tuck in your brainstem.” Mary Ann believes that yoga can make us all healthier, more energetic, and more flexible in our minds and bodies, and she shares her passion with an infectious enthusiasm and an empowering pragmatism.

My yoga bio

Why do you want to teach yoga?

Yoga has made a big difference in the quality of my life, and I’d like to be able to pass that on to others who are interested.

How long have you practiced yoga?

I’ve lost track. At least 16 years of active practice (and when I didn’t practice regularly, yoga influenced my breathing, posture, and awareness). I started learning yoga from a book in 1982, watching Lilias Folan on PBS to de-stress and create energy. I began seriously practicing with teachers in 1998 to heal after a car accident. I’ve worked with mostly Iyengar, Integral, and Vinyasa Flow teachers in Dallas and Austin and have a home practice. At present I assist Eleanor Harris, substitute for her, and teach private classes while I complete my yoga teacher training. http://www.eleanorharris.com/

What is your favorite benefit from your yoga practice?

The level of overall well-being I feel from practicing yoga regularly.

What do you have to offer as a yoga instructor?

Knowledge, from studying, reading, and working with various teachers and styles of yoga. Encouragement, because I know that yoga is wonderful for the human body. Respect, because it is awesome to see students open up with yoga.

How would you describe the way you want to teach?

I teach beginning and mixed-level classes. I base my teaching on the students’ needs. I use diagnostic poses to see where to focus as well as asking students what they’d like to work on. I break difficult poses down into small chunks to make them easier to learn. With permission, I adjust students to help them feel a pose when words are not sufficient.

Do you require props for teaching or not?

Props are always welcome, and if they are not available, I can teach without them.

~~~

You can navigate to my yoga page from any post on this blog by clicking the blog title.

What is this shimmery phosphorescence in the space between things?

A couple of weeks ago, I posted “My spiritual awakening story.” In hindsight, it would have better been named “A spiritual awakening story.” That one just happened to be dramatic and unusual. Actually now, I think they happen all the time on a micro level.

I’ve gotten some perspective on that. It seemed at the time (and until just now) to have happened out of the blue.

Of course it did not.

In the course of writing my yoga teacher bio a couple of days ago, I realized I had been doing yoga for several years when that event occurred. Yoga totally opens up the energy channels.  I was ripe for it to happen.

Too bad I didn’t have a network of fellow yogis to share with and learn from. And still, I paid attention to my chakras after that, and I knew that opening was good.

Today during my sitting, I experienced something much less dramatic that I’m still curious about.

I meditated for over an hour today, and I opened my eyes for quite a bit of that time.  When open, my eyes were in a soft, unfocused gaze similar to the peripheral vision gaze.

What I noticed was a barely noticeable phosphorescence between things – in the spaces between trees and rocks, trees and trees, rocks and water, earth and trees, water and trees, and so on.

It had a faint shimmery quality.

I’ve seen something similar around plants when nightwalking, but never in the daytime.

I thought to myself, either I’m seeing energy, or I’m seeing humidity!

If you have any knowledge or experience with this, I’d love to share – in the comments or offline.

Article: Seven Things I Want to Tell My Beginner Yoga Students

Click here to read this article, originally posted in elephantjournal.com. Boulder yoga teacher Tiffany Hutchings lists what she’s like her beginner students to know.

I agree.

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2010/06/seven-things-i-want-to-tell-my-beginner-yoga-students/