Category Archives: connecting

Asking for what you need, seeking work, and Integrative Chakra Breathwork

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On day 8 of the 21-day gratitude challenge, I am grateful for two dear friends who have asked me for love and support because they need it now.

I don’t know why, and I don’t need to know why. They will share when they’re ready. That’s beside the point.

These friends are people whom I’ve asked for support from when I’ve needed it, because they have an abundance of love for people.

I feel deeply honored that they can ask me when they need it, and that I have it to give. Blessings on you both, and may angels wrap their soft wings around you, carrying you in love, as I do.

***

I am grateful for my skills and abilities to make myself useful. Today, I will be asking for what I need in terms of a temporary/contract job. I do technical writing, editing, training, and a whole slew of other things.

Please ping me if you hear about anything. I’m also updating my LinkedIn profile. Please feel welcome to link to me if you like!

***

Today I’m grateful that I attended an Integrative Chakra Breathwork session last night. This is the creation of Ed Buresh, whom I just met in person last night, and it is a journey through the chakras with sound, breath, and movement.

Ed created the sound, which is marvelous: a heartbeat, a swirsh, and a tone for each chakra based on the earth’s vibrational frequency. I went into a deep theta trance during the 6th chakra and emerged as the sound was receding. It felt like I was working something out that was mostly unconscious.

I plan to return for more sessions.

(Another friend was teasing me about going to this, saying that “integrative chakra breathwork” hit all the New Age buzz words! Not quite. If you add “channel” and “angels” and “purple” and “bio-energetic”, then you’d be pretty close! That angel photo just makes this post complete, does it not?)

Some days gratitude is harder to find than others

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Today I am grateful that committing to writing about three things I’m grateful for (and why I’m grateful for them) for 6 days so far has focused my attention on gratitude!

Energy flows where attention goes, and what this has opened up is more awareness of how connected we all are. Imagine a web of energetic lines connecting you to others you’ve connected with (seeing, hearing, or feeling, directly or indirectly), and lines connecting each of these others to those they have connected with, and so on.

Everyone is connected energetically, and it doesn’t have anything to do with Facebook, cell phones, television, email, or technology (but they have made the world a lot smaller than it used to be).

We don’t do anything, exist, survive, thrive, learn by ourselves, but we each do have a self.

So what is a self? More and more, I understand my self as an energy center, always changing, and experiencing life from the center of my self is like plugging in and recharging my batteries, reconnecting with the mysterious Source.

…

I’m working on finding the gratitude in the fact that I picked up my car from the mechanic shop where it’s been for the last three weeks, and a dashboard light is on that shouldn’t be on. I’ve got to take it back in, and I’ve got Hannah with me today while her mom works this holiday.

Sigh. I’m not grateful for this inconvenience, although I will take it in stride.

I am grateful that I have a car, that I have insurance, and that mechanics can fix things. And I am grateful that no one — and I mean no one — is perfect, including me.

Now impeccability, that’s something anyone can inspire to, and the topic of an upcoming blog post.

…

I’m grateful for a day with Hannah! What adventures will we go on? What fun will we have? How many slugbugs will we see? Tune in tomorrow and find out! (That’s her photo at the top of this blog.)

Generosity, root vegetables, and an offer on my house!

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Today is the fifth day of my 21-day gratitude challenge. It’s still raining! I mentioned my gratitude for that yesterday. Another day of rain in January translates to more wildflowers in April in Central Texas. Plus, with the summers we have here, variety is welcome!

Here’s what else I’m especially grateful for today.

Generosity

Today I’m feeling especially grateful for the generosity of friends and strangers. Since my car has been disabled since Christmas eve (but ready tomorrow — yay!), my friend Thomas has twice let me use his car while he was traveling.

I have appreciated that, and his friendship, very much. The car loan has helped me out tremendously, since I didn’t have rental coverage on my insurance (do now!), and he hasn’t had to pay for long-term parking. I’ve picked him up and dropped him off at the airport (with my daughter filling in once when I had a yoga workshop), returning his car with a full tank of gas. Thank you, Thomas!

I also appreciate my friends letting me bounce my ideas about creating my right livelihood off them, supporting me and sharing information about possibilities for training and people they know who have an inside scoop. I’m mulling over a lot now, and I recognize that my friends have a lot of resources, wisdom, and connections to share.

This last anecdote falls into the category of random acts of kindness, a form of generosity. Who isn’t grateful for those? My friend Victoria shared a story about how she (currently carless) accidentally left her bag with the extra layer of clothes needed to wait at bus stops in January at her workplace, and how a woman waiting behind her in line at a coffee shop offered to drive her back there to get her bag. The woman refused any compensation, as she had had the experience being a carless bus rider herself. Victoria felt supported by the Universe and appreciated having that extra layer of clothes as she went about her day.

Root vegetables

I just made a big ol’ pot of borscht, with parsnips, carrots, red-skin potatoes, and most of all, beets, among the ingredients. Red beets and orange beets and sliced beet greens.

Beets and rainy winter days go together really well. The jewel-like color of borscht made with lots of beets is a warming, heart-opening color to nourish you during these days of low gray clouds and cold dampness. Beets have an earthy taste like no other vegetable I can think of. If you need grounding, eat beets.

Negotiating

I got an offer on my house yesterday, and this time it was in the ballpark! Yay! I’m feeling very grateful. It’s been six weeks since it was first listed, and to tell the truth, it’s been a tiny bit nerve-wracking. It’s not the best time of year to sell.

So I am grateful that a prospective buyer and his realtor are taking my listing seriously enough to make an offer.

I met with my wonderful realtor/neighbor today, and we made a counteroffer. This could go back and forth several times, and it could also fall apart, with one or the other of us walking away. I’m asking what I want, having already come down once, because if you don’t, guess what? You won’t get it!

She’s letting another couple of very interested prospective buyers know that I’m currently negotiating, so if they want to make offers, now is a good time!

Keep ya posted!

Now offering private yoga classes

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I now offer one-on-one yoga classes. I can teach, coach, and help you develop a yoga practice, meeting at my home or traveling to your home.

I love working with beginning students interesting in discovering their “yoga bodies.” I’m good with alignment, having practiced Iyengar for years and taken my teacher training with an Iyengar-certified teacher. I can teach you the preliminary poses that prepare you for more difficult poses.

If your goal is to get stronger,and/or more flexible, to have more fluid movement, to release stress, to develop a daily home routine, or just have more yoga (in the largest sense of the word, connection between your bodymind and the Universe) in your life, I’m available.

I always work with where you are now and move toward where you want to be, adjusting for any issues that may arise.

I love working with beginning students of all ages, conditions, and sizes. That includes true yoga novices as well as those who have had a few studio yoga classes or who have practiced a bit with videos at home at home who want some one-on-one attention.

Because I’d like to get more experience, my rates are very reasonable — $30 for one hour or $120 per month for weekly one-hour sessions, and we can adjust time to more or less than an hour and more or less than weekly. (Traveling to your home costs more to cover the fuel and time.)

Private sessions through Yoga Yoga are $85 per hour, so this is bargain. See the Contact page of this blog for my email address, or call me if interested.

Gratitude for my daughter, women friends, and skilled intuitive healers

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About gratitude journals

From googling “gratitude journal,” the practice apparently began in 1996 when Sarah Ban Breathnach created The Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude as a companion to her popular book Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy.

Here’s a blurb about the book:

“Gratitude is the most passionate transformative force in the cosmos,” promises author Sarah Ban Breathnach (Simple Abundance) in her introduction.

I believe it, Sister Sarah!

Sarah asked journalers (journalists?) to write five things every day that they felt grateful for and said they would feel their lives shift within a couple of months.

In 1998, Oprah Winfrey had Sarah as a guest on her show, and as we all know, Oprah just knows goodness. The gratitude journal took off.

I missed out on this back then. It was in the early days of the world wide web (remember that?). I was working at a computer all day, and in my free time, the last thing I wanted to do was be on a computer. (My, how Facebook and blogging have changed that!)

I was raising an adolescent girl going through her most difficult period, in an often-strained relationship.

Actually, looking back, keeping gratitude journals would probably have been a fantastically wonderful practice for us to share back then, if she had deigned to share anything with me.

Hmmm. She’s changed, and so have I.

What I feel grateful for today

Today I feel grateful for my whole experience of motherhood. From pregnancy (easy), through childbirth (difficult), to the moment I held my new baby in my arms for the first time and she wrapped her tiny fingers around my little finger (instant love), I have been blessed to have had a child, a daughter, and specifically my daughter, Lela Rose, who is 29 years old now.

Lela at her Dec 2010 graduation from nursing school, with her women friends.

I watched and helped her grow up, even as I grew up more myself, and she has turned out to be a mensch, a true human being. I see her in her young adult years now, a mother herself, starting her nursing career just this week, moving through struggle to accomplishment. I see her self-esteem, her worthiness, her competency, her intelligence, her endearing goofiness, her wisdom, her discipline, her caring, her limits too.

What I am most grateful for about being a mother is the personal growth that raising her brought to my life — the growing up that I had to do, the inner work of exploring my values, learning when to be flexible and when to stand firm, the changes that being her mother brought to my life.

Today I feel grateful for my women friends, in particular Clarita and Linaka, whom I spent time with last night. We go way back to 1995 when we began ecstatically dancing together. That is 16 years of knowing each other, talking, coming together and moving away, seeing each other through difficulties and joys and sharing them, traveling together, cooking and eating together, always laughing together, and lately doing NLP with each other.

I feel blessed to have so many women friends, new and old, near and far. There is something about the friendship of women that is so nurturing. I think we let our hair down when it’s just us, in a way that we don’t or can’t with men, because we share the lifelong experience of being women in this culture. And when we have common interests and affection for each other, the connecting is abundant.

Today I feel grateful for those people I’ve encountered so far in my life who are skilled intuitive healers. I’ve mentioned Patrice, my acupuncturist, and Chandler Collins, my chiropractor, on this blog before.

Yesterday I had a heart-centering bodymind session with Bo Boatwright, who is a chiropractor but who has learned and developed a method that one could do with just a massage license.

Having experienced one session with Bo, I’d say his work with me on the table was a combination of massage, chiropractic, myofascial release, rebirthing, and visualization. He rolled me and moved me to find the stuck places, and he dug into the stuck places, having me breathe all the while, until my body spontaneously began to release stress/tension/stuckness in the manner of rebirthing and trauma releasing exercises.

After my body quieted down, I felt sadness arise in my heart chakra. I cried, and Bo asked me about my relationship with my parents, who died in 1984 and 1997 (but of course one’s relationship with parents doesn’t end with death). I opened my heart to them, forgave them, embraced them, kissed them…

A couple of hours later, in a moment of quiet stillness, I noticed a new space in my heart center, an openness that wasn’t there before.

Thanks, Bo. I’m grateful for you. And heads up, you are teaching me.

Gratitude, day one: Mango, my house, the Internet

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Today I start the 21 days of gratitude challenge by writing three things I’m grateful for and why.

Here goes.

Today I feel grateful for Mango, my cat. I feel grateful for him for many reasons. First, he was a neighborhood cat who adopted me — a pet in search of an owner. He began coming over to my house to be petted when I was outside, and I’d give him massages, which he loved. He was so adorable, seeming to ask permission before he jumped into my lap, that I began feeding him and later took him to the vet, sealing the deal. He is a true gentleman of a cat with very good people skills, and I appreciate that very much.

At this time in my life, I am the only human being in my household, and Mango is the first other being I encounter in the mornings and the last I see at night. I miss him when he decides to spend the night outside. He loves snuggling — next to me in bed, on my belly when I’m lying on the sofa reading a book — and he often curls up next to me when I’m writing. He’s family — a true familiar in the old sense of the word — and a cherished companion.

Today I feel grateful for my house. I am not working outside my home much these days, so I spend a lot of time here at home, soaking in the ambiance, while I wait for it to sell.

I appreciate the feeling of spaciousness since I decluttered it. It is a major luxury in my life to have so much space to myself, 1130 square feet, to be exact, with 9.5 foot ceilings. I appreciate the long Victorian windows letting in the winter light and giving me views of bare branches and gray clouds and the moon, the hardwood floors, the symmetries of the rooms.

Today I feel grateful for the Internet. It provides me with a way of connecting with so many people (the 4,299 views of my blog, 405 Facebook friends, 64 followers on Twitter), an outlet for my thoughts and questions and experiments and yearnings, and access to unbelievable realms of information, all available at my fingertips.

It is an amazing web of interconnectivity. Having grown up long before it was developed, I see how it has changed people and society. We are so much more connected now, for better or worse. And I can do so much more on the fly — find an address instead of needing a large paper map, for just one example.

And I need to do that right now — look up an address and go there! Bye till tomorrow!

Let’s get this party started! Free NLP sessions to get you unstuck!

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I’ve been having a lot of fun lately doing NLP sessions with people I know. Since a lot of people are confused or intimidated about what NLP is, I’m offering a special, time-limited offer for the next week, until January 12, 2011.

If you are feeling stuck in some aspect of your life — moving ahead with a project, making a decision — and you are ready for some movement or maybe even a breakthrough, email me at the address on the Contact page.

We’ll seek a time to meet for an hour for an NLP coaching session (which is really just help getting unstuck).

The first session is on me, and sometimes that’s all it takes, just one session to get unstuck. You can take it from there.

In exchange, I ask that you either write a testimonial (can be anonymous to preserve confidentiality, and kindly convey any negative feedback in private) or give my business card to three people you encounter who are stuck and tired of it.

I don’t know the answer. You do. And by the way, the best definition of NLP is this:

NLP is what works.

Read these books!

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I read a lot.

Let me clarify that. I don’t read as much as a few other people read, or as much as I read in the past, but I am a reader. I’ve been an avid reader from a young age, at times indiscriminate but now much more discerning.

It’s that Buddhist saying: “Don’t waste time.” If a book doesn’t hook me early on, I set it aside and try later. It doesn’t mean it’s not good. It just means it’s not relevant enough to what I need to learn in that moment to make the effort feel alive. Energy flows where attention goes. If there’s no energy there, why bother?

The following is a list of books I read in 2010,  plan to read in 2011 (plan, not commit), read before 2010 (and mentioned on this blog) that have shaped my world, and reference books that I dip into but will probably not read cover to cover. Links are included to the books’ pages on Amazon.com; if you buy a book from clicking a link here, I’ll get a very small financial reward — which I appreciate, because blogging takes time.

I’ve mentioned a few of the 2010 books prominently, namely, The Open-Focus Brain, A Symphony in the Brain, Buddha’s Brain, The Revolutionary Trauma Release Process, and What Really Matters. You can do a search for those posts and read what I wrote if you want.

Books read in 2010

Buddha, by Karen Armstrong

Buddha’s Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love and Wisdom, by Rick Hanson

The Heart of Yoga: Developing a Personal Practice, by T.K.V. Desikachar

Krishnamacharya: His Life and Teachings, by A.G. Mohan with Ganesh Mohan

The Open-Focus Brain: Harnessing the Power of Attention to Heal Mind and Body, by Les Fehmi and Jim Robbins

Relax and Renew: Restful Yoga for Stressful Times, by Judith Lasater, Ph.D., P.T.

The Revolutionary Trauma Release Process: Transcend Your Toughest Times, by David Bercelli

Strengths Finder 2.0, by Tom Rath

A Symphony in the Brain, by Jim Robbins

The Web That Has No Weaver, by Ted J. Kaptchuk

What Really Matters: Searching for Wisdom in America, by Tony Schwartz

Yoga Sutras, translated by Kofi Busia (PDF file)

2011 Reading List

The 4-Hour Body, by Timothy Ferriss

Access Your Brain’s Joy Center: The Free Soul Method, by Pete A. Sanders Jr.

The Alphabet Versus the Goddess: The Conflict Between Word and Image, by Leonard Shlain

Beliefs: Pathways to Health & Well-Being, by Robert Dilts, Tim Hallbom, and Suzi Smith

Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking, by Malcolm Gladwell

Chants of a Lifetime: Searching for a Heart of Gold, by Krishna Das

The Complete Book of Vinyasa Yoga: The Authoritative Presentation Based on 30 Years of Direct Study Under the Legendary Yoga Teacher Krishnamacharya, by Srivatsa Ramaswami

Effortless Wellbeing: The Missing Ingredients for Authentic Wellness, by Evan Finer

Emotional Intelligence 2.0, by Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves

Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation, by Parker J. Palmer

Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, by Byron Katie and Stephen Mitchell

Nourishing Destiny: The Inner Tradition of Chinese Medicine, by Lonny S. Jarrett

Transforming #1, by Ron Smothermon, M.D.

Waking Up to What You Do: A Zen Practice for Meeting Every Situation with Intelligence and Compassion, by Diane Eshin Rizzo

Yoga Body: Origins of Modern Posture Yoga, by Mark Singleton

Influential books from my past

The complete works of Carlos Castaneda, starting with The Teachings of Don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge

Dune, by Frank Herbert

Emptiness Dancing, by Adyashanti

The Spiritual Dimension of the Enneagram: Nine Faces of the Soul, by Sandra Maitri

Stranger in a Strange Land, by Robert A. Heinlein

My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist’s Personal Journey, by Jill Bolte Taylor

Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma: The Innate Capacity to Transform Overwhelming Experiences, by Peter A. Levine

The Healing Triad: Your Liver…Your Lifeline, by Jack Tips

Reference books

Light on Yoga, by B.K.S. Iyengar

Poems New and Collected, by Wislawa Szymborska

The Subtle Body: An Encyclopedia of Your Energetic Anatomy, by Cyndi Dale

Yoga: The Path to Holistic Health, by B.K.S. Iyengar

Now Let’s Play (NLP)

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Some of you know that I have training in NLP (practitioner, master practitioner, and training assistant, to be specific). Over the past few years, I’ve had the opportunity to practice NLP on fellow trainees, friends, colleagues, and the occasional client.

I have had so much fun doing NLP that it’s time to let the world know I’m ready to share this amazing work with others!

This post is for those who would like to know more about NLP, which stands for Neuro Linguistic Programming, and which is very popular now in Europe, Asia, and South America even as it continues to grow in the U.S.

What is NLP?

That is a question that no two NLPers will answer alike, mainly because it’s a large body of work with many applications. It was begun in the 1970s when the founders decided to model the excellent performance of three well-known, successful therapists — Virginia Satir, Fritz Perls, and Milton Erickson, who were able to get results that no one else could at that time — and it grew out of what they learned.

Since then many people have studied NLP, applied it, contributed to it, and expanded it — once you learn the basics, it allows for improvisation, which keeps it alive and relevant.

Here are some of the definitions I’ve heard:

  • NLP is the science of subjective experience
  • NLP is the technology of achievement
  • NLP is modern-day shamanism

This is my favorite:

  • NLP is what works

NLP has influenced conscious languaging, EMDR for trauma recovery, EFT and other energy psychology techniques, psychotherapy, sales and marketing, achieving goals, and recovery from phobias, traumas, and allergies.

The whole idea that people are primarily visual, auditory, or kinesthetic? That comes from NLP.

The Key NLP Skill

It is noticing what is, or calibration in NLP lingo.

Noticing what is. Life as it is. Pure Zen.

One of the first NLP skills taught is noticing people’s eye movements when they’re speaking and recognizing that they are showing you something about what their internal experience is. If their eyes are looking up while answering a question or telling a story, it’s highly likely they’re actually seeing an internal image. Ask them for verification.

This can help you deepen your rapport with others, and it can help them access consciously material that previously has been unconscious.

NLP Coaching

When I do an NLP coaching session with someone, I listen to what they want and ask questions. I match their needs to my toolbox, and we work and play together, noticing what gets results.

Since I began training in NLP, I’ve gradually concluded that what NLP does best is help people get unstuck. This generally makes it easier to heal the past, have access to more of their own resources, and have a brighter future with more possibilities.

Sometimes all it takes is one visit.

Contact me if you are feeling stuck in some area of your life! Reasonable, negotiable rates.

Other NLP Resources in Central Texas

The person who I took my practitioner, master practitioner, and evolutionary NLP training with is Tom Best of Best Resources/Texas Institute of NLP.

I’ve also taken both introductory and advanced NLP courses from Keith Fail and Katie Raver at NLP Resources Austin. Keith is also an excellent coach and now assists Tom Best in the practitioner and master practitioner training.

The Austin NLP Meetup meets every fourth Tuesday, with a subgroup interested in hypnosis meeting every second Tuesday. Join the Austin NLP meetup to get information and reminders. (Full disclosure: I’m the program director.)

Linaka Joy provides NLP coaching services from her home base in San Antonio and also runs the new San Antonio NLP Meetup. Her website is called JoyTech.

My heroes of 2010

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I want to acknowledge some people who are heroes of mine in 2010.

My daughter Lela Reynolds graduated from nursing school earlier this month. She is a single mom raising a child with some special needs. That child is now 10. Since Hannah was very young, Lela has been working and going to college. She went to school full-time the last two years. Nursing school is tough, people. She hit the books, did the work, learned the knowledge.

Soon she will take her licensing exam to become an RN. This career suits her well. She likes being useful, is resourceful in a crisis, and is fascinated by humans and health. I think she will work well in settings like hospitals, and she has a couple of employers interested in hiring her. They’ll be lucky to have her.

I am very proud of her, and she did it mostly by herself, with just a little help from me. Way to go, Lela!

Anna Carroll is an amazingly resilient woman I know who discovered she had breast cancer this year. She combined Western and alternative medicine and is nearly done with treatment. I saw her last weekend, and she’s looking good. Anna has a well-developed and creative ability to tap into whatever resources she needs.

Katherine Daniel is another friend undergoing cancer treatment. She kept quiet about it at first and then created a healing circle of friends to provide a supportive community. She’s nearly done with Phase 1, the radiation and chemo.

Both of you, blessings on your journeys. Cancer is a tough one, and you’ve risen to the occasion. Kudos on creating what you need, and I send you my wishes for full and complete well-being.

Abby Lentz is a nationally recognized yoga teacher who lives here in Austin. She created Heavyweight Yoga (aka Heartfelt Yoga) and has made two videos, Yoga for the Body You Have Today and Change the Image of Yoga.

If you have ever considered that large-bodied people couldn’t possibly do yoga, I invite you to watch her videos.

I appreciate Abby for getting the word out — yoga is not just for the young and already fit. It is beneficial for everyone.

I also have great admiration for my cousin Heather and her husband Michael Mazza. They are the parents of six children. They provide an inexhaustible supply of love and direction and leadership for their brood. Watching them with their children in a restaurant is amazing. The kids are well-behaved and friendly, and Heather and Michael enjoy themselves as well. Well done.

I’ve asked friends on Facebook about their heroes for 2010. Glenda says her sister Annie got off her cancer medicine, and that is really GREAT! Yay, Annie!

Katie mentions Linaka Joy for all her explorations and triumphs with health this year. I second that! (My friend Linaka has been a quiet hero, not tooting her own horn but showing us her changed self.) She has changed the way she relates to food, lost weight, and along with the pounds, become lighter in spirit! This year she founded the San Antonio NLP meetup, taking more of a leadership role in the central Texas NLP community. You rock, Linaka! This work will go far.

Katie also considers her cousin Madison a real hero “for the fantastic way she has handled her best friend (who’s also a teenager) having a baby. She stayed upbeat and supportive and used it as a way to strengthen their friendship, despite lots of criticism all around.”

I also want to recognize Barbara Diane Beeler, a fellow blogger and friend, who lost over 60 pounds and is no longer considered obese. She wrote about it in her post Letting Go of Obesity and Regaining a Life. Diane, good going.

Last but not least, I want to mention Gretchen Wegner’s mother, who taught her two-and-a-half-year-old grandson two yoga poses to make diaper changes go well: downward facing dog and bridge pose. Yogis, you get it. Gretchen posted this on Facebook; I haven’t met her mother. I must say, Gretchen, your mom is brilliant! I love that kind of resourcefulness!

Now, who did I omit?