Category Archives: heart

Perceptual flexibility, the large self, the small self, and feeding the wolf

Posted on by
Reply

If you are trying to understand a negative experience, step outside of yourself first. Visualize yourself as a person in a situation and ask, “Why did s/he feel that way?”

Chances are you will discover some new information about yourself, the other person, and/or the situation. Your point of view is larger.

This is a way to gain insight. I don’t know about you, but I find insight to be very valuable.

The less effective strategy is to remember the experience as if you are re-experiencing it, feeling the negative feelings again, and ask, “Why did I feel that way?”

Often your emotion can overwhelm the understanding. People often replay the tape of “he said x, and I felt y” over and over again.

Guess what that does for you?

I dare you to try this now! Think of a recent situation in which you felt an unpleasant emotion. Please pick something with a small to middling emotional effect and not something intensely painful.

For instance, if someone made a remark that you perceived as insensitive and you felt hurt, review the situation as if you are seeing it occur on film. You are one of the characters. See the other character make the remark and see your character reacting.

Now ask, “Why did that remark get to her so much?”

Then notice what happens.

You might need to do this several times to practice if this is new for you.

It’s pretty amazing how such a shift in point of view can make a big difference. Research has shown that people who self-distance from situations that result in unpleasant emotions feel less distressed later, ruminate about the experience less, and are less likely to be hostile when future disagreements arise.

It is amazing to me how many people live decades of their life immersed in either their own point of view, feeling everything intensely, or distancing from everything and not taking anything personally without knowing they can do both — and can choose which point of view to use when.

And…you can review past events and change your point of view. You can actually change your feelings about the past!

We all have a range of emotions. Like the Native American story says, which wolf do you choose to feed? The one with less suffering or more, your own included?

I call this skill perceptual flexibility. It’s worth practicing and cultivating, in my opinion.

By the way, this is elementary Neuro-Linguistic Programming. A scientific study confirmed what NLPers have long known works. I read about it on Steve Andreas’ NLP Blog in case you’d like to read my source.

Massage, brainwaves, NLP, work, yoga, women in prison, Gurdjieffian book group, trailer, and more

Posted on by
2

Life is going pretty well. Knock wood, right?

I’m doing well in massage school. Got in some great practice on three people outside of school this past Wednesday, ahead of Thursday’s practical exam. I have a major written test next week and then a week off. It’s hard to believe that I’m about halfway through!

Tomorrow it will be three months since I finished brainwave optimization. I am glad I did it. I feel more centered, my memory is better, and so is my focus. It’s been worth the expense, and I can still go back for individual sessions if I feel the need. It’s been helpful with juggling school/trailer/moving/remodeling/working and so on.

I’m looking forward to doing some gamma wave enhancement when my trainer Gigi Turner at NeuroBeginnings is ready and I have time.

Also, I can have a drink now! You are warned not to drink alcohol during the training and for three months afterward. Kinda makes me wonder what alcohol actually does to the brain. Any drinking I do will be very light — my alcohol tolerance is low.

I did an NLP session with a friend today and picked up a freelance writing/editing job for her website! This is my second recent website writing job. I love doing this for people who have created and are running their small businesses that make the world a better, healthier place, people who are living their passions. I’m looking for more work like that.

I posted my technical writing resume on Monster.com a couple of weeks ago. I’m looking to work 20 hours a week at most, flex-time and telecommuting preferred. Meanwhile, I’m open to doing freelance writing and editing, as well as more yoga and NLP coaching.

I’d love to teach yoga out of my trailer to individuals or small groups (up to 4 max). I’m putting this out there so if you know anyone in South Austin who’d like a small class with more personal attention, you can refer them to me.

I’m considering teaching a donation-only class on Saturday mornings until the weather gets cold. I plan to check out Searight Park in my neighborhood as a possible location. I have Sun Salutations on my mind!

I’ve been attending a weekly class in Anusara yoga at Castle Hill taught by Brigitte Edery or Liz Belile, both great teachers who stimulate and challenge the mind and body. It’s a natural segue from my Iyengar-based training. Love the attention to awareness.

Next week I’m going with Keith Fail into the state prison in Lockhart to teach some basic NLP to women in prison, as part of Truth Be Told‘s Exploring Creativity program. We’ll teach triple description — first, second, and third position, like first, second, and third person in English class, only applying it to your real life. Perceptual flexibility is a fabulous skill to teach, and I’m looking forward to it.

I’m participating in a book group, reading Life in the Labyrinth, by E.J. Gold. This is my first foray into the Gurdjieffian lineage, not counting my longtime interest in the Enneagram. The group has been meeting for a while, and I’m honored to have been invited. We take turns reading aloud, covering a chapter a week, and enjoying some stimulating discussion.

I’ve signed up for a one-day workshop at Lauterstein-Conway later this month on cranio-sacral massage. I’ve mentioned before on this blog that I received CST every month for 2-3 years from Nina Davis. It is a fascinating branch on the massage family tree.

Week after next, I’m trading two hours of Swedish massage, with all the extras, for a two-hour lomi lomi (Hawaiian style) massage with James Moore. Really looking forward to that! I haven’t had a lomi lomi massage yet but have read about the Hawaiian healers who have kept this art alive.

Last, the trailer. I’m working on finding the best weatherstripping for the aluminum jalousie windows — something that will last that I can buy in bulk for the 48 windows, which have had the old, melted weatherstripping painstakingly removed.

Then, I hope to replace the nonworking sliding glass doors at the entry with something that works and build an entry deck. I’ve been using the back door to come and go.

Oh, and I must share this! August 2011 was the hottest month in the hottest year on record in Austin. It was also my first full month of having AC in the trailer. Friends have been telling me about their outrageous electric bills — as much as $400.

My AC ran nearly all day every day in August. I worried about my bill being outrageous.

The August bill was $100. Whew! Jon Esquivel at Austin Star Services did a good job getting a good unit in this trailer. For that I am grateful.

Other tasks coming up include plumbing and wiring my shed for a washer and dryer, getting some good window coverings and installing them, and planting more trees and a fall garden with some edible landscaping.

I am really, really loving my life now and the direction it’s going. It’s scary to make a big change in direction like I did, and it is working out well. Knock wood!

Being a Five, reading, writing, and what works

Posted on by
2

Part of my journey as a Five on the Enneagram has had to do with my attitude about information.

As a child, I took to reading like a duck to water. I soon became an indiscriminate reader. Comic books, school books, the classics, storybooks and novels, poems, my parents’ books/magazines/newspapers (they were avid readers too), cereal boxes, food labels, trashy magazines, entire menus, every sign that I encountered, billboards, and so on.

My eyes and my mind were very attracted to the written word. (I wear contact lenses now, but my glasses were as thick as Coke bottles.)

I behaved as if I believed that if I read everything I possibly could, at some point I would understand everything. Life, the universe, my purpose, the answers.

This was an unconscious belief, as so many are.

The irony is that I missed out on some important aspects of living because I had my nose in a book!

On the plus side, I was a very good student in school and have gotten many jobs because I could read and write well. (Being an avid reader is the basis for being a good writer, in my opinion.)

I’ve become more discriminating with age, I’m happy to report. I don’t read everything any more. Whew. That wasn’t a very good strategy, was it?

In fact, these days if I start reading a book and if it is not compelling from the start, I put it aside. Maybe I’ll finish it later, maybe not.

Of course, much reading is simply required — road signs, food labels, homework, text messages, deposit slips.

I’ve become more conscious about why I read. Now it’s more of a choice about what information or inspiration will broaden or deepen my journey. 

The reading I most treasure these days is finding new and useful information, information that makes a difference in people’s quality of life. I guess you could call this kind of information insight or wisdom. 

That kind of reading and discerning gives direction to this blog.

I love discovering what works, and I love to share what I find. When I think of what “the truth” means to me, it’s useful information that works or that serves quality of life. Like how to prevent insomnia or a particularly useful way of phrasing an idea, for example.

I’ve also become more attracted to the questions. More on that to come.

Heck, maybe this is one of those things that you know about me already. If so, please rejoice that I’m becoming more conscious.

Feet report, planting a tree

Posted on by
2

Well, my feet did not take me to Barton Springs after all on Saturday. I woke and remembered it was a day of honoring my feet, of letting them lead. I put my attention into my feet, feeling into them.

While still in bed, I did some exercises that Fran Bell gave me to increase my ankle and hip range of motion. Out of bed, I did the Z-Health foot exercises that Patrice Sullivan gave me to open foot meridians.

After that, my feet felt alive and glowing! They took me to the shower. I love washing my feet, especially between the toes.

You can say to yourself:

Oh, those are my ordinary feet, and they look clean. I feel them resting on the floor.

Or you can think:

Wow, my feet are tingling with life force, energy, chi! I wonder how far the energy would extend if I could see it. Seriously, if this energy produced light, you could read by it!

Well, those feet took me to my yoga mat! I did a leisurely round of sun salutions, paying special attention to my feet in tadasana, lunge, plank, down dog, and so on, feeling the mat and pressure and stretch and strength and position and air currents.

Then my feet walked me over to the zafu and zabuton. I turned on a timer for 30 minutes and sat. I wanted to spread the aliveness of my feet into the rest of my body.

That was a great start to my day.

The rest of Saturday, I checked in periodically with my feet without thinking too much. They wanted me to make monkey tea. They wanted me to do some more unpacking and arranging at the trailer. They led me to set up my hummingbird feeder.

Then we ran errands. We went to Home Depot, and among other items I bought a soaker hose. My landscape architect friend/writing client Merrie told me I need to water the ground under my trailer, where there are big cracks in the bare soil from the drought.

I came home and soaked the parched earth.

Feet, connect us to the earth, pachamama, terra firma.  Connect us to our big blue marble. Keep us grounded in what we do. Let us be of service to you.

In the evening, my feet served me well when I gave my daughter her first massage from me, the first of many, I hope.

I danced for 90 minutes on Sunday morning. My feet felt free, loved, and joyous. After lunch, I stopped at The Natural Gardener. I needed some potting soil and bought some basil, thyme, and peppermint. The garden center was nearly deserted. Most people give up on gardening in August around here. I’m just getting started in a new place.

And then I wandered through the tree section. Thirty percent off a tree is substantial, and they had quite a few $24.99 trees before the discount. Half my trailer is unshaded, and since I can’t plant a tree 10 years ago, now is the next best time.

I thought I was going to get a cedar elm but felt pretty ho-hum about it. After discussing various oaks, I was drawn to an arroyo sweetwood (new to me), and one of The Natural Gardener’s plant-loving helpers showed me a mature one next to the parking lot that had been planted about 7 years ago.

Wow. These trees grow fast, are native to northern Mexico so can take heat and drought, and are fragrant, smelling like cinnamon and vanilla. They are multi-trunked, and have spring flowers, a dense canopy, and autumn foliage. Something wonderful for every season, plus scent. How perfect can a tree be?

So that’s what I bought, for just under $18. The cashier said my tree looked like a happy tree! I was a happy customer.

On my way home, I saw a sign:

I bought a tree to plant on the hottest day of the hottest month of the hottest year on record.

Yes, you can plant trees at the end of August if you are willing to check the dampness of the soil several inches down every couple of days. They’ll tell you how at The Natural Gardener.

Got home, picked a site that will perfectly frame a view of the tree from inside a nearly-floor-to-ceiling window, and watered the ground. Water, let it soak in, dig, repeat.

I finished digging this morning and planted the tree. When I came home this evening, my new little tree was having its branches gently jostled by the warm wind.

Next up: mulch.

So that’s what happened from letting my feet lead. I got so connected to the earth, I bought a tree and planted it! I took care of the ground under my trailer. I gave my daughter a massage. I did yoga and sat.

Grounded.

Thank you, feet.

Monkey tea

Posted on by
2

A little fun Saturday morning in my new kitchen, making myself a cup of yerba mate. Found the monkey tea brewer at Wheatsville Coop in Austin, Texas.

I like monkeys.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Top 20 thoughts to think while meditating

Posted on by
Reply

This is a repost from Elephant Journal, written by Blake Wilson. I found it quite hilarious!

My favorites:

15. I got this shit down!

12. Everyone would totally freak out if I started floating.

If you’ve spent much time on the zafu, you may like this a lot too. Click the link above to read the rest.

You can check out Blake’s blog here.

 

15,000 views!

Posted on by
Reply

Today this blog passed a major milestone, 15,000 views.

It’s taken a little over 1.5 years to reach that level, learning much along the way.

Thanks for checking it out, whether you’re a subscriber, occasional reader, or found your way here via search engine. I’m grateful for your interest in the same kind of things that fascinate me. Which I know isn’t just anybody’s cup of tea! It says something for you that you are also interested in healing, yoga, Buddhism, meditation, wellbeing, useful science, wisdom, and more.

I love the connection, especially when you share via emails and comments.

I hope to make it worth your while to continue to read here.

What would you like to see more of?

A doctor who uses yoga in his practice

Posted on by
Reply

Saw this article in today’s New York Times and thought I’d share.

When patients with rotator cuff injuries do a pose derived from yoga, the results were as good or better than surgery or physical therapy. The yoga pose is headstand with the forearms making a triangle with the head, but you can do it against a wall — inversion is not required. It works by letting a new muscle do the work of the injured muscle.

Another study found that for patients with osteoporosis or its precursor osteopenia, ten minutes of yoga every day for two years built bone density in the hip and spine, while the controls lost bone density.

Yoga is weight-bearing exercise using the body’s own weight, especially in partial and full inversions. In addition, stretching pulls on the bone where muscles attach, and this can build bone density.

Another article is about piriformis syndrome, when the sciatic nerve is pinched by tight butt muscles. It can be caused by prolonged sitting.

Pressure-point massage can help. Some home exercises can provide relief in the majority of sufferers.

Free day of yoga class at Thrive Fitness

Posted on by
Reply

I’m teaching Yoga for Stress Reduction for Free Day of Yoga on Labor Day, September 5.

The location is Thrive Fitness (formerly NiaSpace), 3212 South Congress, Austin 78704.

Time: 6 to 7:30 pm. Class size is limited to 15, and the doors close at 6 pm sharp (so we can get on with the relaxation!). Bring your mat and water bottle.

If you’ve never experienced restorative yoga and think you might like to try it or if you have experienced it and want to make it a regular part of your life, please join us if you can for a deeply relaxing experience!

Although details are still being worked out, it looks like I will be teaching this class regularly on early Friday weekends, sort of a yoga happy hour/release-the-work-week/relax-for-the-weekend/gather-for-healthy-dinner afterwards type of class.

I’m very pleased and excited about that!!! Thank you, Universe, for coming through, because I’d been hoping for a Friday evening restorative class! Thanks, Donna, Becky, and Todd, for making me feel welcome.

Reader shares info on shaking medicine gatherings, Keeney podcast

Posted on by
Reply

I received comments from Jose Luis that I’ll share below, as he provides links for those interested in gatherings for shaking medicine as well as a new podcast from Sounds True of Brad Keeney:

Hi MaryAnn!

Thank you for your kind words.
I attended two gatherings in Portland, but the thing ended. I know two possibilities now: One is going to New Orleans for some good mojo… ; )
http://www.mojodoctors.com/

…the other is joining two beautiful souls that have studied with Bradford Keeney:
http://www.oursacredjourneys.com/spirited-explorations.html

I just want to add that “shaking” can include a vast kinetic vocabulary, including spontaneous taichi-like movements, spontaneous toning, wild laughter, etc. etc… (the expansive, blissful feeling is a-ma-zing…you begin to feel like you are “cooked” by the heat of an amazing love…) the beauty of all of this is the mystery, the unexpected, being moved by the Lifeforce, for the lack of a better term….

Another scholar/practitioner, Stuart Sovatsky, has written about this unending Mystery from the perspective of being a kundalini yogin/psychologist…
http://www.cit-sakti.com/kundalini/sahaja-spontaneous-yoga.htm
Kundalini and the complete maturation of the ensouled body:
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_7642/is_200901/ai_n39234948/pg_13/

A big hug
Jose Luis

This comment was followed shortly by this:

Ah! I forgot!
This is a recent, great interview with Brad Keeney that is worth the reading…
http:/www.soundstrue.com/podcast/bradford-keeney-shaking-it-up/

Thank you, my friend, for sharing these links. I love what you said about feeling “cooked”. Martin Prechtel used that same word to describe some of his experiences as a Mayan shaman in Guatemala.

Every few days I wake up and feel like I need to do some shaking. I just lie in bed and let myself shake for a few minutes. And sometimes while driving, I let my legs shake while keeping my foot firmly on the gas or brake pedal as needed!

I also had an experience recently in which I felt like I could really use a good, long shaking session, but it was not the right time and place, and later the urge had gone.

I’m looking forward to having that urge when I can shake as long as needed, really surrender to it.

This must be part of my transition from sedentary work, but I notice times when my body just needs to be moving. Sometimes at massage school, we’re all sitting or standing still, listening to a teacher or watching a demo, and I just have to move or I feel stiffness setting in. I try to keep my movements small and discreet.

I just want to say that if you want to really wake up and be alive, your body is a master teacher. Listen to it and respect it.